Ok so no-one has actually said that I should be over the whole IF deal. But the implication is there with a lot of people. It frustrates me that people cannot see that living with IF is like being in a state of constant grief. Sure you have periods of time when you're not there, but for the most part, it is like living with a knife through your heart because the very thing you want and desire so much looks like it may not happen most of the time.
The thing is, I am moving to a better place with my grief. I know it. Yet it upset me today that a woman I trust basically said because of my IF struggle, I wasn't coping in a voluntary position I have. That makes me so very angry. True, the affects of IF do spill out into the rest of my life. But I'm really trying hard to do the best in all areas of responsibility that I have in my life right now. I thought it was unfair of her to assume that just because my personal life is in disarray that anything else I do will be affected.
Anyway, I'm still sticking to living in the present. It's going well. I've done a lot of baking this week it seems - have had a few things to bake for out there.
I took my last Clomid pill tonight of round two. I had a glass of wine at a function we went to briefly tonight (as we took our daughter). I'm quite cynical about this round of Clomid as ovulation seems unlikely. But you never know.
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