Third appointment with "healer lady"

Well I had my third appointment with the"healer lady" this arvo. I think it went well. I'm not sure how you can tell the difference between a good and bad appointment with a vibrational healer. I guess like anything, it's a case of going with your gut. So, going by that, it went well. I do feel things shifting emotionally during and after the sessions. I felt stuck for so long, now I don't. I have a scarey emotional mountain to climb yet I've started the traverse already. The only way is up from here.

I'm still struggling with getting my head around the fact that my emotional shite could be causing my hormonal imbalance. If so, how much emotional crap exactly is there to deal with?! The "healer lady" has never come out and said that the two are connected yet she has certainly implied it. The fact I have one ovary and that it's removal may have contributed to ovarian failure/premature menopause is much easier for me to grasp.

I actually fell asleep for a few brief moments on the table at today's session. I also saw a baby boy, in my dream-like state. I happen to be reading about dreams in The Fertile Female right now so will pay a bit more attention to them from now on.

Things are subtly shifting. I am blogging later in the day for instance. I just don't feel like starting my day with yet another rant about how I don't have another baby (!) So I've been enjoying starting the day on what feels like a more positive note. I'm going to the gym a little less. I still do my three cardio sessions a week and weights once a week but only go to Pilates/Yoga when I feel like it. I haven't felt like it the last two weeks. It's actually been nice having some nights in. I'm making more of an effort to have quality time with my husband on week-nights, even if it's just to watch a bit of tv together while drinking tea. I guess I can already see that for many weeks/months my SIF shit was so hard for me to manage that I could only do so by going to the gym several times a week. Now I'm fit but I don't feel I need to escape to the gym so often anymore. Having said that, I will go as many times as I want to in a week. All I'm saying is I'm not going to force myself to go x amount of times if I'm in the mood to just chill some weeks. Just going with where I'm at.

My next appointment with the "healer lady" is in a fortnight. She said I might feel a bit low after today's session as the emotional stuff starts freeing itself up, as such. That is kind of what happened and mainly why I didn't go to the gym tonight. It feels like being at home and embracing what I do have - a family of three - is the most gentle thing I can do.