Perhaps the last post was OTT

Ok I admit it. Claiming some people may think I don't love my daughter may have been a bit OTT (over the top). Yet I was only trying to make a point and that was that a lot of people seem to think I don't appreciate or value what I already have when in fact they couldn't be more wrong. I feel like I'm constantly having to prove my gratitude for my daughter and justify why I want another child. Why, oh why when child-bearing is the most natural thing in the world?

I guess my cage just really got rattled this week as I felt singled out when not just one, but two friends basically conveyed the same thing in two different emails. I just have to remember their comments did ultimately come from a good place.

Yesterday I met up with two MOTs and their children at a local cafe. It was a bit of a handful for the MOTs dealing with two kids in an area that wasn't fenced off. So I helped out here and there with the kids. It is always a relief when I can just dive in there and genuinely want to help out MOTs. It makes a nice change from feeling riddled with envy and resentment.

There are some changes/opportunities coming up in the wings. In two weeks time I'm doing my acrylic and oils evening art course. I have a new creative friend that I met at the gym and we've quite seriously talked about setting up a stall at a local market in late December. (it's an annual market). That gives me a couple of months to get some paintings together. My attitude is I've got nothing to lose. I just want to give it a go - and to have some fun doing it! Yes you heard - fun!!

I applied for a work-from-home position recently and the company was interested but didn't have any vacancies. Next month I am going in for a couple of tests - a spelling grammar test and a microsoft word test as they are now recruiting. The job involves transcribing from audio tapes. I'm just looking for something extra to do since my daughter will be moving on to morning Kindy at some point next year which equates to 5 x four hour mornings a week. I have a wee freelance job on the go at the moment too (graphic design). I'm just being reminded of my skills at this point and of possibilities/opportunities to utilise them.

I'm still trying to stick to one day at a time and to concentrate on God's will for me within every single day. If I can trust God in increments, then maybe I'll be able to trust Him in the bigger picture too.