Women are amazing when faced with difficulties in life. We try our best to keep our chins up high, yet process all we need to while searching for some kind of sense amidst a crisis. I have certainly found this to be true of all the women I have met in the infertility communities on Dailystrength. It is interesting to note that many women after a decent period of time of battling with IF, start developing their own personal philosophies in order to cope. I definitely think that is a very individual process even though many of us may see some aspects of IF in the same way.
I've personally swung between the first three philosophies below while in the IF game. I haven't yet got to number four but have thought about it. But right now I sit on number two. There are cross-overs between each outlook and all four involve living in the present and accepting circumstances as they exist today.
1. The Power of Positive Thinking: The word infertility is banished. Instead fertility issues are referred to and women are seen as being "fertility-challenged". The belief and hope is high that a baby is on the way - just in Gods time.
2. Accepting Gods Will: After hoping for so long that God will come to the party, it seems easier to accept that perhaps it just isn't going to happen. It's a process of surrendering a dream which is painful to do but at the same time, brings relief.
3. Whatever Life Brings: This philosophy is somewhere between the above two. It's about letting go of the desired outcome and carrying on with life. A baby still might be on the cards, but it no longer becomes the key focus or hope.
4. Moving On: It seems easier to bail out than to hang-in there. Or perhaps the end of the IF line has been reached biologically.
I'm sure there are other personal outlooks out there that other women have developed. If so, I would love to hear about them!
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